Q&A: How to Maintain a Positive Relationship with Your Child
In this Q&A follow-up to our conversation with Dr. Rubén Parra-Cardona, Dr. Dave answers eight listener questions about building and maintaining warm, positive relationships with your children, from toddlerhood through the teen years.
He covers questions, including:
- How do I stay present during child-led play when I'm bored out of my mind?
- Can I build a positive bond with a child whose personality clashes with mine?
- How do I stop my "inner drill sergeant" from taking over?
- How do I keep the relationship going when my teen won't talk to me?
0Key takeaways
• Being together is the most important thing. You don't have to be endlessly delighted during child-led play — just showing up can fill their emotional cup.
• It's okay to talk about your differences. When personalities clash, explicitly telling your child "I'm devoted to building our unique relationship" goes further than you might think.
• You can be warm without losing structure. Ditching your “inner drill sergeant” doesn't mean abandoning your values — it's a "yes, and" approach: maintain expectations while opening space for connection.
• Instead of questions, try descriptions. With a silent teen, use behavior descriptions, reflections, and praise instead of peppering them with questions — it resets their expectations and opens the door for genuine conversation.
• Positive Parenting Thriving Kids Curriculum
• Positive Parenting Thriving Kids Curriculum
Creators and Guests
Host
Dave Anderson
Dave Anderson, PhD, is the Vice-President of Public Engagement and Education and a senior psychologist in the ADHD and Behavior Disorders Center at the Child Mind Institute. Dr. Anderson focuses on the expansion of our awareness-building and prevention programs while also leading initiatives that build the Child Mind Institute brand, foster strategic partnerships, and forge new relationships with policy makers and youth mental health leaders.
Producer
Andrew Dearling
Andrew Dearling is the Digital Director at the Child Mind Institute, where he leads strategy and execution across web, email, social media, and digital campaigns. He focuses on using digital tools to connect more families with mental health resources, expand the organization’s reach, and drive measurable impact. Andrew combines deep expertise in content, platforms, and performance marketing with a clear understanding of how to reach people where they are, and move them to take action.
Producer
Chad Garber
Chad Garber, a seasoned Creative Producer with over 15 years of experience, shapes branded video, digital, and experiential content for Fortune 100 companies, agencies, and in-house teams to Child Mind Institute. Known for building high-performing creative operations, he led pro-bono productions to multimillion-dollar campaigns for brands like Verizon, Microsoft, New Balance, Budweiser, and FedEx. His sharp storytelling, deep production expertise, and collaborative leadership move ideas from concept to screen with impact.
